Oo-eee what a day.
And I haven’t been at work 15 minutes yet.
Not sure why I woke up grouchy, but everything has irritated me this morning! On the drive in, people pulling out in front of me, easing over in my lane, turning in front of me. You know, because I own the road.
When I got to work, God and I had a little talk, and I do feel better. I'm not angry, just short fused, with no clue why! Being angry or mad is a different story all together.
If something embarrasses me, though, I can’t stand that. I’ve been known to hold grudges for that offense for years. Yes, I know it’s a sin. I try to work on it, but it is one of the things I have the most difficult time with in my Christian walk, this thing called unforgiveness. (Actually, it’s the forgiveness aspect that gives me issues.)
My sister once reminded me of how much we need forgiveness ourselves, and that does help; but before I know it, and when I least expect it, there will be a repeat offense or something will trigger a memory, and I’ll be right back at square one, fighting the urge to give someone a piece of my mind. (As if I can really afford to lose any brain cells.)
There are times I have to forgive a person on a daily basis who has hurt my family. I find myself having conversations in my head with the perpetrator…things I wish I’d said, things I want to say…and I have to stop, ask forgiveness, and do my best to put it out of my mind. It’s not easy to bring thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ.
If I do something that someone else doesn’t like, when I refuse to back down because I feel I’m right, but they won’t let it go, that irritates me. There comes a time when I can just be pushed too far, and I get irritated. If I’m not trying to change their mind, I don’t want them trying to change mine.
When I get really mad, one of two things happen: I tell it like it is, or I resort to the silent treatment. Sometimes, those two things happen one after the other.
When people intentionally hurt others, I really can’t understand that! There must be something not working right in the head of a man or woman who will single out another individual to humiliate, mock, or purposely hurt their feelings. I’m not talking about violence. That is a completely different case that I am not covering in this post.
On that same token, though, the word “bullying” is tossed around too much these days. Just because someone doesn’t like a comment made to him or her, they are not necessarily being bullied.
I have a low tolerance for stupidity. I always have, but I believe I have more patience now than I did in my younger days. It doesn’t automatically make me angry, but it does make my sarcastic nature come to the surface. When that happens, once again, I am the one in need of forgiveness.
Do you find that something that didn’t make you mad yesterday might burn you up today? I do, at times.
I have little patience with myself when I deal with the same thing for the millionth time. But I don’t normally get mad at myself. I like to cut me a little slack. Funny how that works, isn’t it?
So what gets your goose?